A cook with no loyalties?

Wow! And like that one of my favorite Pirates is history. What went wrong Sean ol' boy? Did you add too much pepper to the last meal? Did everyone take you for the kind that would poison their dinner? Did they smell something fishy? After all, you said it yourself, you had "no loyalties on that ship."

And watching the Webclips, Sean indeed plays the double-dealer. A shocking scene shows him talking with Nessa, telling her that Jupiter is conniving and should be booted off the boat. Moments later, he's talking with Jupiter and saying the same about Nessa. Of course, the magic of editing could be making this look much worse than it is. For all we know Jupiter and Sean had an agreement to deceive Nessa.

Even so, Sean failed to gain his crew members' trust. Joe Don seemed to be having none of it when discussing his high bid for the Pardon. And moments later Nessa seemed to be whipping Sean like a dog in front of Azmyth and Jay.

That said, I'm going to miss the often critical Pirate chef. He was a key ingredient to the ship's chemistry, giving it that special flabbergasted ballast.

-Mr. Horatio

Men are from Mars and Women are from...?

I don't buy into any of that planetary gender crap, but I do believe women and men are different enough to bring in some unpredictable dynamics on the Picton Castle. Obviously, we're aware of Nessa's flirting and how it is "keeping the women divided," chuckle, chuckle. But then again, are they?

That's what our boys' club in the Captain's Quarters would like to think. But maybe Nessa is playing the decoy and Laurel is less aloof than she seems. Despite Joy's complaints about her, Joy did not vote for Laurel. And, do we really know whether Kendra would have voted for Nessa or Laurel? She voted for Sean.



Also, a powerful alliance among the remaining crew could still call a Mutiny. If, say, Joy, Nessa, Laurel and Christa were to have a sisterhood, all they would need to do is convince Joe Don, Louie and Jupiter to join. Jupiter still seems tight with Azmyth and could be functioning as his spy. But when pressed, or axed, who can say?

And so the brilliance of the Mutiny and the Pardon are coming into full focus. Those who feel threatened can join in a Mutiny more easily. But then a needed Pardon subsidized by the Captain and others could sway those in danger.

We're also five rounds into this game and there has been no female Captain yet. But with the increasing likelihood of a Mutiny, being Captain also ain't what it used to be.

-Mr. Horatio

Stink eyes and poopy faces

Manners are falling to the wayside as the Pirates trudge onward for their treasure. At the beginning of this week's episode, dislike between the Pirates really came out into the open. It's written on their scowling faces. Sean had dagger eyes for Nessa, who scoffed right back at him. "She's a bitch," Jupiter added as she joined the battle.

But Louie and Joe Don kissed and made up. Ironic that these two were entering a new honeymoon while everyone else is cutting throats. "There is no more vengeance in my heart," Louie proclaimed to his once sworn enemy.

We'll see about that good swab.

-Mr. Horatio

Kendra the kettle

In one of her camera interviews, Kendra says she'll vote against Laurel, saying she's an "automatic liability" on Expeditions. I could be misguided, but isn't that what everyone has said about Kendra all along as well? This is wishful thinking on Kendra's behalf. And blindness. Delusion, really. Her delivery is not even ironic. Rather, it's that old cliche, the pot calling the kettle black.

-Mr. Horatio

O Laurel, how you keep us guessing

The best part of this week's installment came at Pirates' Court when Laurel calmly challenged Captain Azzie's pretenses about not being a team player. Of course, our good Captain, who has regressed to his stupid accent, blundered first by using the word "sides." Laurel then went in for the kill by asking Azzie to explain his flawed, unethical reasoning. Of course, the poor sucker failed miserably against such a clear-sighted intellect.



"I'm not on anybody's side but my own," Laurel said matter of factly. And I believe her in the philosophical sense. It's not that she's selfish or only out for herself. She may even be a little lazy. But in a public forum, she's making a case for honesty and real leadership.

It was an awkward moment for her fellow dread-locked Azzie, who found himself trapped in a lie. "The thing is I don't have sides," he said. Um, yeah, right. Laurel could see right through his bull and everyone knew she had exposed the new boys' club.

Poor Azzie. Didn't the Pirates just play an Expedition with cards? And yet, eager for the gold, he exposes his own bluff before the homestretch is nigh! And Jay, who is afraid of Laurel because he doesn't know how to play her--she doesn't give him the time of day--wonders whether she is making herself a target or has the superior strategy.

Well Pirate Jay, it could be both. As everyone else takes sides early, those still in the cold may flock to Laurel's little flag of independence.

If she wins, it will be a sweet referendum on the controlling, know-it-alls on board.

Frankly, I hope she wins the whole shebang.

-Mr. Horatio

Place your bets!

As we get ready for Round Five on the Picton Castle, our message board posters are sharpening their guesses about how the game is playing out.

"ok lets get real for a sec," writes Dreadrobert. "JD does have a point about Louie being totally motivated out of anger, anyone can see that, and that's just as wrong....now in the matter of cutting someone adrift, it should be based on their actions of course. so it wasn't wrong to cut cheryl loose! yes she was a strong player, but she also was JD's best friend and therefore couldn't be trusted not to align with him and stab you in the back. so i would have voted against her too!"

But when it comes to the matter of Jay, Dreadrobert writes, "they need to get rid of Jay because he'splaying dirty with everyone; just like a true pirate would! it's like 2 sides of a coin. let's all have fun with this, but in the end it's all about the money!!!"

And message board regular Hockeyson makes the following observation about Joe Don: "Is it just me or did J.D. look like he'd been drinking too much rum? His eyes looked glazed over and his words were kinda slurred."

If so, all for our entertainment. And, whoa, there is some serious anger out there toward Joe Don still and lawyers in general.

AMaryKayLady replies to the Joe Don defenders, "bLAH!... jd IS GREEEDY... SLAVE DRIVER....that is what made everyone mad! whew.. 200.00 out of how much loot... please..give me a break!!....Cheryl did admit she disconnected herself.. cause she did not WANT to associate w/the rest of the crew.. (just like a rl atty, wanting to get all the pay and make the paralegal do all her dirty work)"

But my favorite two cents is from Captain Biff: "RIGHT-ON! Joe Donkey was drunk last night. Come to think of it, he is always seen drinking from his cup. I thought it was rude when Donkey was Captain and they fed the crew 'gruel' while the 3 Stooges dined on the good stuff!"

Joe Donkey? Ouch, that's brilliant.

-Mr. Horatio

Read the Week Four Blog