And we're off!

Sixteen strangers jockey for serious loot on Mark Burnett's latest reality adventure. Welcome to the Pirate Master Blog, where we'll provide some inside commentary on the show and bring you other pirate-related news. Here you can dish and call attention to other juicy tidbits.

Being a Mark Burnett brainchild, Pirate Master looks like it will make the usual Survivor lot pretty happy. Newcomers will probably enjoy the beautiful shots and exotic locale.

-Mr. Horatio

Special Note: Going forward, no spamming like the comment below concerning Jericho is encouraged. Not liking Pirate Master is anyone's prerogative. But making this wiki a platform for an unrelated agenda is out of spirit with CBS community protocol. And yes, while I may have stumbled into the Caribbean via Miami, I am at least in the same time zone.

Good Ol' Pirate John

The pirates arrive and from the get-go host Cameron plays up the serious mood, "You'll be expected to pull your own weight. If you don't, there'll be consequences." Hello Mr. Cameron, pleased to meet you too.

The show barrages us with wild images, like crashing waves and a snake crawling through a skull's eye-sockets. It's the Burnett touch, letting us know this show is more about fantasy than reality.

Of course that's the fun, but someone forgot to tell one of the more colorful contestants not to take this too literally. John, the Chippendale scientist, is actually the most entertaining character on the ship. He reminds me of a few friends I've had, very smart and motivated but such a misfit he rubs everyone the wrong way. Maybe John can't help it. "That boy's crazy" as one shipmate remarks.

And yet time and time again, he saves his Black Crew's butts. He's a doer, and quite frankly, more of an action-pirate than the rest. He's the real thing you could say, an outcast who plays by his own rules, his measure simply being that he gets things done. Of course, he's just too much the solo-pirate, and if he'd done his homework he might have recalled that Burnett shows are mostly about making alliances. Besides, living on a ship requires some manners.

So even though he's one of those types that can rub people the wrong way with his arrogance, you can't help rooting for him a bit. Once he's gone, the rest of the lot seem a little pathetic in comparison. I was sad to see him go.

At least the show gave him a proper "cut adrift" on a raft. A hilarious and melodramatic touch. Burnett is playing big just like John.




-Mr. Horatio

A lot of firsts, including vomit

Pirate Master has a lot of firsts for the reality show genre. For one, it openly embraces a fantasy element with gusto. Yo-ho-ho! For another, it's the first I know of that actually has people sailing a big ship, climbing towering masts.

Add on top of that Joy's puking over the side, and we've got something truly original in a genre known for its gimmicks. Vomit is about as real as you can get beside bodily harm.

-Mr. Horatio

Which way is north?

Perhaps the most comical moment yet in this new series was John's direct challenge to Captain Joe Don's navigational abilities. We don't need no compasses, the Captain says. Oh yeah?

"Which way is north?" asks our pesky Chippendale scientist.

"Umm, I, I have no idea," stammers the Captain as he looks into the cloudy, dark night.

Hmmm, not a good sign.

As benzy66 points out in the PM Message Boards, the ensuing train wreck, or, err, shipwreck, may be the best thing about the show: "That is the only reason I will continue to watch this show. I'm going to tivo it, have a couple of beers and watch the train wreck unfold."

-Mr. Horatio

Mr. Horatio....
Ah Joe Don did say they were too far south to use the Little Dipper for navigation.

Captain Jeau D'ean?

There was a revealing moment last night in the premiere episode when Joe Don boasts to his officers, the increasingly nervous Ben and Cheryl. He even refers to himself in a faux French accent as "Captain Jeau D'ean."

Correct me if I'm wrong, but were the French ever known for their piracy? In fact, the French navy is not as famous these days in comparison to the English or Spanish. Perhaps it was a joking way of sounding official?

Joe Don's own style of arrogance isn't lost among many in the crowd either. Obviously Louie smells something rotten. As baelzar comments in the wiki, "This guy's painting a huge target on his back. Looks like it only gets worse next week."



And how about those compasses? On the Boards, becciboo echoes the approaching storm for the Captain:

"...trying to navigate by the stars...can put you off by hundreds if not thousands of miles. Why do you think they invented compasses? I think they will all rue the day they voted John off if for no other reason than the loss of the compasses."

-Mr. Horatio

A Ship of Sheep

Getting some great commentary from our viewers. There's a large contingent that are very sad, even irate, about Pirate John getting the boot. A few have pointed out that the crew acted feebly and should have had the guts to revolt againt Captain Joe Don. Evelgal writes, "This is how Americans vote in general. We're all brainwashed to be sheeps....If they voted the captain off, the next reward challenge, the new captain will know better than to hoard the treasures all to himself. I wouldn't obey the captain and clean up the ship without getting paid !!! sheeeshh....."

-Mr. Horatio

Cloned Pirates

Here's another good jab by our ever skeptical, wary fans -- DreadEleanor asks: "Does Mark Burnett keep all of these people on some kind of clone ranch in a remote Montana valley?" I think the comment is less aimed at how these contestants look but at how most Burnett shows cast similarly diverse groups from similar walks of life. That is, the contestants as a whole seem to be from the same ranch? Maybe people are just that predictable and that similar in the long run, especially with the help of casting directors.

-Mr. Horatio




Great Start; As a pyrate fan and follower I find this show at least interesting. I've been pyrating for 5 years now and know it takes all sorts to make a crew. Captain Joe Don has the potential to make an ok Captain, but he'll have to be more like a true pyrate captain and not quite so "piratey" there is a difference. Pyrate crews were the first, last and only true democracy. They truly had one man one vote, and the captain only lasted as long as he respected the crew. Oh and about the money split, the only difference between this share and a true pyrate share was the crewpersons knew what their percentage was when they signed on (it was part of the ships articles). For example in Black Bart's article 10; the share was divided as follows: Black Bart and the Quarter Master got 2 shares each, the Master, Boatswaine and Gunner eqach got 1 and 1/2, all other officers got 1 and 1/4 share each. Everything else was then divided into 1 share each for each crewman. Everybody got something, but some got more than others. The crew must have thought it was ok because they continued to do it until they were dead. -Nyre the Black Rose